Monday, May 15, 2017

Warmer Weather-Clothes Shopping Hell

So with the temperature hitting above 70 on a semi regular basis and the sun attempting to be somewhat present in our day to day lives, and after taking a survey of what warm weather clothes I have, I have nothing that fits by the way. Which means clothes shopping.  To some this is a blessing, but to me it's more a curse.  I've never been a clothes shopper, at least not for myself.  Yes now I don't have to go to the plus size part of the store but clothes shopping has always been my Achilles. Too many bad memories and tears in dressing rooms, wishing I could find an outfit, any outfit that would work.
But my new dilemma is a bit of loose skin on my arms and stomach.
Now I'm not freak show material yet and I'm not going out to buy that all necessary string bikini but i have noticed my arms and stomach have some elasticity issues. Stephen King isn't going to be writing a horror suspense novel on them but I noticed it more recently.  It's been a little over 7 months and I still have 4 1/2 to hit one year and my goal weight which has 3 numbers in it.  I'm hoping to lose an average middle school child by September.   I'm not vain, at least I don't believe I am but due to 3 ten pound babies and so far 82 pounds of weight loss I've really tested the elasticity of my poor skin. Perhaps some of it will bounce back in time but that is a bridge I will have to cross at a later date.  But right now after seeing myself  with shorter sleeves and shorts on I'm having a bit of an internal issue with it.
So  this is how I'm dealing....
My inner bad ass tells me to power on, keep doing what I'm doing and we will worry about the cosmetic later,  but she seems to be asleep when I get out of the shower and see my whole body reflect in the mirror, that's when my tiny insecure voice kind of pops her head up and gives me that "oh dear" look.  You know the look, like when you are swimsuit shopping and it looks fantastic on the hanger, they have it in YOUR size, and you are all pumped up but then you put it on and look at in those horrible fun house dressing room mirrors and all you can think to yourself is "Oh Dear!".
So this has been my thought process the past week. 
It's a mind over matter thing.  If I don't mind it shouldn't matter,right? So next weekend I'm going shopping, I have to due to a business trip to Arizona at the beginning of June. Yes Arizona in June, so lighter clothing is a necessity not a luxury.  So guess I will have to buck up and take a leap with both feet into the clothing store!!!  I'm going with a positive attitude and the promise of a treat of some kind at the end, perhaps a scoop of ice cream?  In my world, one scoop of vanilla ice cream from Dairy Queen or Culver's would be an extreme treat!
Maybe I'm being petty or too sensitive about the issue.  I'm proud of what I've done and I'm looking forward to what I will do, and maybe I'm the only one the deals with this issue, maybe not. But one thing is sure, I can't let this curtail me.  So saddle up partner, this cowgirl is going to ride to the nearest mall and lasso her some clothes.
I'm choosing to work through this small hump but I will hurdle over this and blast ahead to crush the elusive number 90, but until then I must remember that I"m not a super hero at the moment since my magic lasso, bullet reflecting bracelets, invisible plane and Wonder Woman costume are at the cleaners.  So I will just be me and get out of my head, remember that I'm happy and that is a wonderful thing!!!
Another day in the twisted and complicated mind I am the owner of.
I wish you happiness this week, I hope your troubles are few and your blessings are many.
I never know what I'm going to write until I finish so each entry is as much of a surprise to me as it is to you.
So my thought of the week is this:
Don't let anyone, including yourself, get in your way!  I'm working on that daily!

Have a peachy week my friends.

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